Friday, 24 January 2020
The Restless Native The Restless Native

Male Version of Wellness Treatment is Not What You Think

By  May 04, 2017

When it comes to fixing things around the house, I live following that old saying: „If your husband says he will do something around the house, he will do it. No reason to remind him every 6 months“.My wife doesn't see the humour in this.

Having our own company, especially one that takes us out of our home office so frequently during much of the year, we find ourselves having very little time to dedicate to various chores. Some of the more urgent ones we will find the time for, but plenty of things that need fixing which are not vital to our existence often end up waiting in a state of disrepair for a while before I get to them. There are so many other important things to worry about before directing my attention to the light bulb in the hallway or a door frame than needs a new coat of paint. However, I do find occasional joy in fixing things. It's one of the typical male earthly pleasures. You get to work on something that is usually very simple and demands enough of your attention to force you to forget about the other worries. Most of us enjoy these moments of complete surrender to a simple, time consuming task.

One thing that is as important to the whole thing as doing it properly, is losing your nerves when the task becomes too complicated, messy, or you simply realise you've made a mistake. Sometimes wives don't understand this (I'm not naming any names). They think we are suffering under pressure of the task at hand and our stress levels are increasing. This is not true. Shouting like a maniac and cursing the company that sold you the piece of furniture/electronics you are trying to make sense of is an integral part of the DIY experience. It's therapeutic. After an hour or two of cursing everything Swedish while putting together a piece of IKEA furniture which almost ends up looking as abstract as its name would suggest, I feel rejuvenated. While assembling this flimsy structure I have no worries in the world. No life problems can penetrate the vale of short-lived rage that washes over me every time I can't find the screwdriver I had in my hand a moment ago. It's what I do instead of getting massages and listening to ambient music during a bubble bath, or whatever it is that women do for the same effect.

I recently saw a video online of a new service business in New York, where you can pay to enter a furnished room and smash everything inside with various hammers, crowbars and similar tools. It seems like a fun enough experience, but perhaps a better idea would be to have things inside that need fixing. It is easy to break a ceramic vase and it will bring you some sort of short-lived release, but gluing the pieces back together takes you much longer and forces you to be careful, focused, and even mind your breathing if it’s delicate enough. Doesn't that sound like yoga?

Next time you hear your husband screaming from the other room while putting together a new piece of furniture, don’t be alarmed, he’s probably happiest he’s been that whole week. Unless he has power tools with him, then you might want to check in on him after all because those things are dangerous and some of us are really clumsy.


Bozidar Jukic, AKA The Restless Native, is a Dubrovnik local with too many interests to name them all, with writing being at the very top of the list. He is a lover of good food, music and film, and a firm believer in the healing power of laughter. His professional orientation is towards tourism and travel so it comes as no surprise he spends most of his time alongside Mrs. Jukic running their own local tour company. Their goal is helping travellers from all over the world get a more intimate experience of Dubrovnik and what it has to offer. To find out more about their work, visit their website or Facebook page.

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